Alyson, the neighbor

I've been thinking all afternoon about Fulty's prayer request at the end of her last blog--about her desire to have more non-Christians in her life.  So, I'm going to turn this into a little forum...a time to ponder these things.  Obviously we need to be present in the lives of those who do not know Jesus.  I have a handful in my life but could certainly stand to extend outside my social bubble.  I was forced to do so today when an out-spoken, Children's Place clothes-wearin' six year old came bounding into our yard and wanted to play with Kenna.  Her name is Alyson.  She moved next to us with her mom and stepdad right around fall and it is only now that the weather is getting nicer that we are finally starting to meet them.  

Many things about this new family make me shrink back to the mousy junior higher that used to be nervous and intimated by the 'popular kids'...their brand new BMW suv, nice clothes, she works at a hospital and a bar, he apparently makes enough to pay for a BMW suv (or atleast enough to go into debt for one) and they lived together before getting married.  Then there was the time I watched her rake her leaves while smoking a cigarette and drinking a beer one glorious late morning.  This family, in so many ways, couldn't be any more opposite than Eli and I--yet we are called to put our hand out, speak to them and be part of their lives.  

So I made small talk with the pretty new neighbor while all the time being self-conscious about my brown helmet or my untweezed eyebrows, or the fact that my children wear second hand clothes and I drive a secondhand minivan.  And also not forgetting that I believe in a God that everyone wants to put in a box, dismiss, judge as intolerable or outdated, or shape into their own patsy go-to god.  

Why do I do this??  Why am I intimidated by people outside the Christian social circle, by people whom, measured up to the world's standards, have a lot going for them.  Why is it hard to proudly be me, the Christian dork who is pleased with her life.  It's not that I want these things that they have--I think I'm just so weary of being labeled, judged and considered odd--all of which I have experienced with my own family in some way--and I'm tired of it.  I think we get to a point where we have been saturated so long in our Christian circle that it's hard to step out and see that we're actually the minority and not the majority in society.  

Then there is the whole issue of the little girl.  She really likes to play with Kenna but she is such an only child--speaks whatever she wants, asks for whatever she wants and bosses whomever she wants and I cringe at the idea of what she could teach my dear sweet Kenna.  But isn't this where the rubber meets the road.  For many years I've talked about wanting my home to be the home where the kids come to play--but now that it's here I get nervous, self-conscious and want to hole up because I don't want to be seen as the weird, different ones.

I definitely need boldness and confidence with my stance on my faith.  I have no problem confidently believing in Christ.  I loose confidence though when face to face with others who are clearly different.  Am I alone in this???

Well, we'll see how things go with Alyson this summer.  I have a feeling this won't be the last of her :)  Time to hike up my skirt, stand proud and plunge forth!  

Keep your eyes open Fulty--your non-Christian just may come bounding into your yard one day!